Hey, Watch this!!!!
Famous last words….dangerous last words….especially when you’ve been drinking cheap wine and sitting in the driver’s seat of your dad's van at the drive in….but let’s back track a bit.
During my youth in the late 1970s, there was a glorious time in our lives called SUMMER BREAK! Many days and nights were spent in my ORANGE ROOM enloying the summer. I was going to ICC and it was 1978. I was working part time as a delivery driver for an auto parts store and was making enough money to support myself.....barely. Every night was a Saturday night as long as I could make it into work the next morning. I remember some rocky ones, but I could bounce back pretty fast back then.
On one particular Friday night, Art Stafford, Roger Baysinger and myself decided to take in a drive in movie. The movie was THE DRIVER.... starring Ryan O'Neal and it was showing at The Bellevue Drive In in Bellevue Il. (I actually live a few blocks away from the long torn down theater. ) Back then, the movie really wasn't as important as the party inside the car. I have no recollection of this movie and I'm sure it sucked rocks. I do seem to remember that O’Neal was some kind of high speed stunt driver and the movie was full of high speed chase scenes and crazy driving. After the movie and a few bottles of cheap wine, we decided to leave the Drive In and get home for work. I think we all had jobs.
After placing the speaker on the pole next to the van, I let out a victorious cry!!!!!! Hey Watch this...I'm Ryan O'Neal!!!!!!! And with that, I floored the gas pedal on my dad's white van with side pipes and proceeded to spin the tires in the white gravel.... sending dust and rock in a grey spray into the dark night. As I began to maneuver the van in a sideways skid, WE CAME TO AN ABRUPT STOP!!!!! Much to my horror, I had accidentally driven over a SPEAKER POLE a few feet away.... unearthing a giant block of concrete which rested un notice below the surface like a freaking ICEBERG!!!!! We sat HELPLESS...the van rocking on this giant DEATH STAR with only the right two wheels touching the earth. The left side of the van was precariously teetering on the concrete block two feet off the ground!!! The left side pipe had been damaged and was letting the whole world know that I had just made a serious mistake and was intoxicated!!!! BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM!!!!!!!!!! On and on, the sound would ricochet throughout the drive in GETTING MUCH LOUDER as I desperately tried in vain to rock the van off my nemesis!
Now I loved my two friends, but on this particular night...let's just say they weren't much help. They were too busy crying laughing and dying over my predicament and turn of events.
After their laughing died down, it bacame apparent that we ALL could get into trouble if we didn't get off this rock. I shut the off the engine as to not draw any more attention to us and we all began to manually rock the van until we were free. The van chugged all the way home and I'm surprised my parents didn't wake up.
The next morning, after a sleepless night in MY ORANGE ROOM... I stuck my head in my parents bedroom. It was Saturday morning and they were both off. I told my dad that I had a slight accident the night before and told him I'd have it fixed before I came home from work that night! He didn't say much but said to get it fixed!!!! "How did you knock that pipe off again?".... he asked when surveying the damage. My head began spinning and I recounted the story as best I could. Of course I'd leave out the booze part and the reckless driving part. I became the victum of a sloppy back row of the drive in and un safe lighting. It sounded good. It worked. I'm sure he wanted to believe it as much as I did.
I had a coworker follow me to Tuffy muffler down the street from work and I picked up the van at the end of my day. Not only was it fixed perfectly, it was way under the cost that I had expected. I was delighted and gave owner an extra ten bucks and told him to buy a bottle of whiskey or something!!!! When I got home, dad inspected the repair and was satisfied. not only of the work but I think because I had lived up to my word and had
the repair done and with my own money. Whew!!!! That was close!!!!
After a shower, I was off again in the white van to pick up my cousin Crystal to see the Cheap Trick concert that night!!!!!
" Hello there Ladies and Gentlemen...are you ready to rock?" Yes we were !!!!
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