Stand up and read please..... OMG.... that’s enough!!!!

Today’s Tale from the Orange room was a few months before there was an Orange Room. Prior to the Orange Room, My bed room looked like pretty much everyone’s. How boring! But there was one thing that was beginning to grow…..My Beatles album collection as well as books and magazines about the Fabs.

One such book that was a favorite of mine during 1972 was the John Lennon Rolling Stone Interview from 1970. The book was called, Lennon Remembers.  John had just broken up from the Beatles and had just come out of Primal Therapy. He was full of raw emotion and his language reflected that in the interview. There was LOTS of cursing and brutal honesty in his answers to questions about among other things, what it was like to be a Beatle? There was a great parody done by National Lampoon that year that had Christopher Guest sounding like Lennon singing some of the more memorable quotes to Lennon like music. It was called Tragical Misery Tour. Funny stuff

In English class, Mrs Hawkins was requiring each person in the class to read several paragraphs from a current book they were reading at the time. We all hated reading out loud, I still do and I think a lot of people are kind of uncomfortable about it. Mrs Hawkins started in row one and continued down each row in order. At this pace, it would be my turn in about two days. I was less than enthusiastic about this exercise until it dawned on me what I could read out loud!!!!! LENNON REMEMBERS of course!!!!! I’d already read it once but a second reading couldn't hurt. Especially if I was lucky enough to hit on a paragraph loaded with Lennonisms and foul language !!!!! Perfect to blow the teachers mind and make my classmate howl with laughter!!!!!

A few days later, it was my turn to stand up and read my book to the class. I’d just sat through two days of boring Happy Hollisters stories and Little House On The prairie stufff.... mine was going to blow the roof off!!!!

“And now Darren, what will you be reading for us? “ Mrs Hawkins asked.

“Lennon Remembers” I replied.

I picked up the interview where Lennon was asked about the touring years.....what was it like?

The paragraph began,

It was like some FUCKING Fellini movie!!!! FUCKING whores everywhere !!!! Just fucking Insane. I know there’s some picture of me coming out of some fucking Whore House in Amsterdam crawling around on my fucking knees.

They had to bribe the police so we didn’t get our fucking pictures in the paper and ruin our image.....”STOP!!!!!

STOP Darren....thank you ....that was enough please!!!!!” “Well you certainly are reading some adult material there”

The class was falling out of their chairs by the time the second FUCK floated out of my mouth.... hovered in the air and circled the teacher before disappearing into the ether.

I had proved my point that I could read and took the teacher down with less than one paragraph. She did ask me to find another spot in the book, so I paged ahead several chapters. That paragraph began like.....

I’ve always needed a drug to survive. We all did but me the most. Speed, drink, uppers and downers, fucking acid and all of it. “Ok Darren!!!! That’s enough thank you.” Sit down please!!!!!

The book I read in class.

Amy you‘re next.