Not long before my Mother passed in January of 2020, we were discussing parenting and how much things have changed since I was a teenager. I reminded her how they bought wine for me to drink when I entertained their many parties... playing guitar and singing. I could never comprehend buying one of MY kids booze at 15 or 16 years old, but Mom would always defend herself by saying, the 70's were different times. Indeed they were. In fact it was better to be a kid in the 1970's than a parent in the 2000's. In the modern era, parents would be in deep trouble if they were found guilty of supplying underage children with alcohol. But such were the days. The 1970's..... when days were psychedelic.
My first solo appearance for one of my parent's parties must have been when I was about 12 years old. I had been taking guitar lessons weekly but frankly, I didn't enjoy them much. It was too much like school with bits of black and white specks on mimeographed paper. I often wanted to quit but am glad I didn't. To be honest, my interest in the guitar would not blossom until later that year after watching a rerun of THE BEATLES AT SHEA STADIUM on TV. Once I hit puberty, I began to notice all those girls. It was my incentive to put more effort into learning the guitar. Mostly I learned from Beatle records and a few Beatles chord books. I'd like to say I enjoyed my first taste of entertaining but that was not the case.
Parties at my parents house in the early 70's were definitely not for kids and my brothers and I were usually in bed by 9:00 or 10:00 at the latest. Which was fine. What wasn't fine was my Mother coming into my room sometime after MIDNIGHT and demanding I get out of bed and play some songs for the people in the living room!!!! Imagine a 12 year old wiping the sleep out of his eyes, in his PJ's, old enough to know that he looked ridiculous and was a sitting duck for drunken humor and obnoxious behavior. I was a little boy/man and was feeling very uncomfortable with the cat calls and whistles. "Now sing a song", my Mom barked. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. So embarrassed. People were yelling songs for me to play but I really had only recently learned to play a couple of easy songs. I think I may have learned Watching Scotty Grow and a couple others.
Even at 12, I could tell that my Mom was drunk and so were the others. I tried to focus enough to play but I just couldn't. I felt like I was a fraud…. a let down.….a disappointment. I started to apologize that I really couldn't play anything but my Mom was having none of that!!!! " Yes you can play...so play something now". "I'm paying enough for those guitar lessons so you should be able to play something by now". With that, I put the guitar down and walked back to my bed room trying to hide the tears that were beginning to flow down my 12 year old cheeks.
I was humiliated, I was mortified. I could hear them laughing at me and my Mom cackling about something. I was hurt and couldn't believe she would embarass me like that in front of a bunch of strangers. Dad came in a few minutes later and I could tell he wasn't as bad as the rest of them. I asked him, "why does she embarass me like that"???? I don't rememer his response, but I was glad he knew I was extremely upset.
By the time I was 15 or 16, I was playing monthy in a band and knew many songs or could improvise if needed. The parties were only getting wilder. My folks had got married very young so in the 70's they were in their mid 30's and making up for lost time. On one particular night, I was playing guitar and singing...on a school night… and someone brought me a highball and set it next to me. I drank it and before long another tumbler was filled with ice and golden elixir.
I began to feel full of energy and had all the confidence in the world. I was singing my heart out and people were really enjoying me. I liked this. I liked the way I felt with some booze in me. I must have drank 4 or 5 before my Dad drove me home so I could go to bed. When he left to return to the party, I was dizzy and laughing while I jumped up and down on my bed. This feeling was amazing!!!! I wanted to do this again.
Many parties followed and Mom would say, " Jim, buy Darren a bottle of Boonesfarm or something." I was thinking, "Hell yeah". Once I began drinking, the night would just become a frenzied jukebox of tunes. I thought my parents were so hip for letting me drink. Smoking came next and by the time I was 16, I was a little adult. The mid 1970's. Yes, they were a different time, but looking back, I can see this symbiotic relationship between drinking and playing music began as a teenager and has continued my whole life. In moderation of course!
Just another story from THE ORANGE ROOM.
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